Mental Health Awareness Month Day 8

My Mental Health Journey

Talking about mental health in general is one thing—talking about your own experience is another. It’s easy to stay in the space of ideas, definitions, and observations. It feels safer there. More controlled. But personal experience is where things become real, and sometimes a little uncomfortable.

I experienced postpartum depression after my son was born. Back then we weren’t very good at diagnosing this condition. My feelings were dismissed as being normal for a new mom…..”you’re just tired because you aren’t getting much sleep”….”it’s just your hormones”……etc. A few years later I experienced anxiety and depression after my first husband took his own life. I lived in a small rural community and had no access to behavioral health care. I relied on my family and friends to get me through it emotionally. I learned that journaling helped me keep in touch with my feelings. I learned to take long walks with my mother. Her ferocious personality made me laugh and cry and sometimes made me mad. But she kept things real for me.

I eventually moved on with my life and remarried. The marriage was plagued almost immediately by my husband’s infidelities. And then the marriage ended when he died of a heart attack. Once again I was thrown into the arms of depression. This time I was smarter, and I found counseling. I learned the skills I needed to build my resiliency. How to change the narrative in my head, how to set small and measurable goals and celebrate them, how to find the things that were still good in my life.

Once again I was able to move on, and I remarried again. I got it right……. I married a man who would give his life for me, who supports me though all life’s trials and tribulations…..who was at my side when I was diagnosed with cancer and helped me maintain my resiliency through that journey.

If you are feeling depressed about the things life throws at you I beg you not to give up. Surround yourself with people who can help you find your joy again. Take one small step at a time. Keep in touch with me so you can read more about my journey when my book gets published.